[Pause] button

Those who know me more than likely know that I have the nasty tendency to never quite finish what I start. There are a couple reasons for this, some due to fear of rejection (if you never finish it, it can't be rejected you know) and some due to character quirks which I enjoy. The most notable of those quirks is that when engaging a project, ussually my imagination is strong enough in constructing a realized form of completion in my head long before the project reaches the real state of completion; but, because my mind's eye can already see the completed image I have at that point already gleaned the satisfaction in my self of having pursued and conquered a task; and it is then at this point that I let the project lie to gather dust. Never mind that it never actually got completed, I saw what it looked like.

Another factor in the lack of my follow-through is the plain and simply fact that I get highly excited by a whole boat-load of various things and try to put my hand to far more of those ideas than I could ever hope to complete. It's like an ADD octopus, turning the keys to a hundred doors but never going through any of them.

I recognize this fact and want it to change, which is why it pains me that I think that I need to be realistic and say that I am not in a season where it is a call on me to sustain a regular flow of essays here in this blog that I would like to do. Once a month simply is not going to happen. So, this is the end folks. The end of all things.

Not really, i may turn this space into a normal blog, a sparse web of mental sticky notes which may be interesting only to myself. But considering te next season of my life, I am attempting to narrow my field of focus (and have been commanded to do so in prayer) in the attempt to dig deeper into the ares that I do focus on.

This is a bit of a shame for me, i enjoy writing these sorts of essays and this is not the first place where I have attempted to write these sorts of exercised thoughts down but this is not yet the time for it.

This is also not to say that I am ceasing to think upon these things. My heart has not changed and so if any of you come across this blog and would like to talk about some of these things about the the arts, imagination and christian creativity, please find me. I love to talk about these things, or write you an email about it. But for now, I won't be trying to post those thoughts here so, Farewell for now!
j.r.myszka